Valentine’s Day: America’s Favorite Love Languages

Love is in the air! It’s that enchanting time of the year when people buy heart-shaped chocolates, flowers, write sweet handwritten notes, and battle for that dinner reservation at their partner’s favorite restaurant. Yep, Valentine’s Day is coming right up! 

But how are Americans planning on expressing their affection during this romantic holiday? Will they be prioritizing quality time? Buying thoughtful gifts? Writing cute little notes around the house? Cooking up their sweetheart’s favorite meal? Or perhaps, cozily snuggling with their partner with a classic Valentine’s Day film? To find out, we surveyed 3,000 Americans to discover each state’s chosen love language. 

Key Findings:

  • ‘Acts of service’ takes the spotlight as America’s top love language (to express), winning the hearts of 33 states
  • ‘Quality time’ emerges as America’s favorite way to receive love, as voted by 27%
  • ‘Giving gifts’ ranked as the least favored love language among respondents across all demographics (generations, genders, and state location)

The #1 love languages goes to…

Out of the five universal languages — acts of service, quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, and gifts — Cupid clearly left its mark in America! Here are the love languages respondents love to express towards their partners. 

Acts of service stole the hearts of 33 states, making it America’s #1 love language and the truest ‘heartthrob’ of affection! These states will express affection through thoughtful actions and gestures on Valentine’s Day. Whether it’s baking a favorite treat, tackling their partner’s disliked chore, or brewing a morning coffee with an ‘I like you a latte’ card. Sweetness sure is served in these states.

In eight states, every second counts as quality time emerges as the 2nd most popular love language in America. Watch out for the lovebirds in these states — Alabama, Arkansas, D.C., Idaho, Maine, Maryland, Ohio, and Utah — as they’re gearing up to give their sweethearts focused and undivided time on Cupid’s day. Romantic getaways and shared activities seem to be on their agendas for Valentine’s Day. 

In a tie for third place, physical touch and words of affirmation have taken 18.8% of each of America’s hearts. While some sweethearts plan to pour their love into thoughtful, handwritten cards, the other 18.8% are preparing for cozy cuddles with a favorite movie this holiday.

Wrapping up the love language rankings, giving gifts ranks last as it’s only used by 9.4% of Americans. Don’t let its unpopularity fool you, as it’s still a romance-packed love language! These few participants are planning to showcase their love through thoughtful presents this Valentine’s Day. So if you’re in Alaska or Oklahoma, get ready for a wish list come true!

Love languages best received by the nation

We opened the floor to our respondents with the following question to gain perspective on the receiving end of love:

“What’s your favorite love language to receive from your partner?” 

The results? Quality time shines high in the rankings once again, but this time, reigns as the #1 favored love language on the receiving end, as cherished by 27%. Every second truly matters in America.

Physical touch secures second place, at 25%, with acts of service closely behind in third, at 22%. Words of affirmation finds itself in fourth according to 20%, while receiving gifts, once again, wraps up the top five list at last place (6%). 

Honorable Mentions: Love language preferences by gender and generations

Across the spectrum of genders — female, male, non-binary, and transgender — acts of service rank first as the favorite love language. No matter the gender, the language of actions tugs at the heartstrings of the nation. 

When it comes to love across the generations, Gen Z, Millennials, and Gen Xers unite in their affection for good quality time as their chosen love language. Boomers, however, are dancing to a different rhythm – favoring physical touch as their expressive language of love. 

A heartwarming conclusion

It’s evident that love knows no boundaries or restrictions, as it shows differently through the five universal love languages in their own ways. If you’re on the lookout for an intentional and meaningful way to express your love this Valentine’s Day, let our state-by-state love language breakdown be your compass on the 14th. 


In January 2024, we surveyed 3,000 US residents across the country about their love language preferences. The average age of respondents was 38.9 years old. The representative sample comprised of 60.6% female, 36.7% male, 1.9% non-binary, and 0.8% transgender. 

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