Carb Powerhouse Dominique Ansel Coming to Paris

Fresh from his success at Caesars Palace, pastry chef Dominique Ansel is set to bring a new offering to Paris, Dominique Ansel Marche.

Yes, technically it’s “Marché,” but we don’t like accent marks. It’s unclear why. Possibly, it’s because we built Web sites when the Internet was first invented and accent marks would cause some browsers to implode.

Dominique Ansel Marche opens in fall of 2024 in the former JJ’s Boulangerie cafe space at Paris, near Martha Stewart’s Bedford restaurant.

Any day when A.I. get the number of fingers right is a good day.

The Internet says “Marche” can mean a few things in French. It can mean “walk” or “market” or “bargain” or “emporium” or, yeah, it’s probably “market.”

The news release says, “Inspired by the sidewalk markets in France, Dominique Ansel Marche marks the launch of an entirely new concept from Chef Dominique, showcasing croissants and viennoiserie baked fresh each morning, made-to-order crepes, seasonal fresh fruit tarts and cakes, ice cream and more.”

We don’t do that little tent (technically, circumflex) over the letter “e” in crepes, either.

There’s a popular off-Strip restaurant in town called Marche Bacchus. In that case, there are two words you’re probably pronouncing wrong. It’s “mar-shay baa-koo.” Don’t pretend an accent mark would’ve helped with that one.

While we’re happy to hear Dominique Ansel Las Vegas has been successful, we’re even more pleased when a company like Caesars Entertainment embraces humor as it did in social media for the announcement of Dominique Ansel Marche.

We wrote a blog for Caesars Entertainment for several years, and let’s just say at the time humor wasn’t really beloved. Or even remotely grasped, really. When we launched the company’s Pulse of Vegas blog, we wrote 100 blog posts before it went live just so they couldn’t make us remove the jokes.

What remained of the Pulse of Vegas blog, the precursor to this very Vital Vegas blog, was unceremoniously booted from the Internet in 2021.  Sadly, Las Vegas casinos have never really gotten the value of content marketing, and tend to be averse to the “social” part of “social marketing.” Deep sigh.

The aversion to humor by many casinos is shocking, really, given snark is the most effective and trusted means of communication in the social media era, and casinos are supposed to be fun.

Caesars Entertainment got a new owner, Eldorado, so the culture appears to have changed, thankfully.

We do have a couple of thoughts about the Dominique Ansel video, however.

First, the video shows a lack of sensitivity to the ongoing oppression of mimes in American culture. Back in the day, mimes were revered, and mime (or pantomime) was mentioned 40 times in one of the world’s most popular historical documents, the Bible.

Trust us, fellow youths, acts like Shields and Yarnell were superstars a few decades ago, and Marcel Marceau made mime an international phenomenon.

We, personally, were an award-winning mime in high school. Yes, in answer to your question, bullying helped make us the psychological trainwreck we are today.

Some teens had sex, we had pancake make-up and imaginary friends.

More recently, we portrayed a mime in a “Mindfreak” parody, “Mimefreak.”

At some point, though, the world turned against mimes.

Mimes are one of the few groups in our society everyone agrees it’s acceptable to mock and marginalize, along with Nazis, Florida residents, lawyers and people in public relations.

What the hell did mimes ever do to you? Other than perhaps making you see invisible things and sparking your imagination?

This may not be the forum to advocate bringing back mime, as the subject isn’t black and white, so we will move along. Keep fighting the good fight, Tom the Mime at SeaWorld Orlando.

The other thing about the Dominique Ansel Marche announcement video is now we know how to pronounce “Dominique.” You thought it was a name inspired by a French adult film actress for a minute, admit it.

It’s actually pronounced “Dominic.” We are much more comfortable with that.

The chef displays his popular Croissant au Fesses. Do we have to do everything for you?

Dominic Ansel seems an affable sort, and is best-known for inventing the “Cronut,” the result of a doughnut and croissant getting it on in the restroom of a Parisian nightclub. We may have embellished a little.

Ansel’s Web site says, “After its launch on May 10, 2013, Cronut pastry fans spanned the world from Berlin to Singapore, making it the most virally talked about dessert item in history.” Why is it cool to ridicule people in public relations? There, you have your answer.

Still, Cronuts have undeniably made a splash. Dominic Ansel cranks out new varieties of Cronuts and other pastries at Caesars Palace, and we trust he’ll do the same at Paris.

Croissants have always been lame doughnuts, so this seems a natural enhancement.

Why have we given so much ink to a pastry shop opening at Paris? Beyond the mime thing, of course.

Well, it’s a slow news day. And we have a sweet tooth. And anytime we can find an excuse to make fun of the French, or lawyers, we are so up for it.

We also have a soft spot in our heart for Chef Dominic because his shop at Caesars Palace has a Cookie Shot robot. The shot isn’t particularly good, but a robot makes it! Here’s a look.

You know we’ll be at Paris to check out Chef Dominic’s new pastry shop at Paris when it opens.

We would love to see the mime in the announcement video, or even a real mime, at the grand opening of Dominique Ansel Marche. Blue Man Group would qualify, but they work for MGM Resorts.