Bellagio Conservatory Unveils 2022 Christmas Wonderlandery

The Bellagio Conservatory has done it again with the unveiling of its Christmas display for 2022.

We braved the crowds to bring you a look at this year’s holiday spectacularity.

It’s not the holiday season until Bellagio makes a this.

The Bellagio Converatory’s holiday display is remarkable for a number of reasons, but especially because it’s still free.

Every year, we reluctantly predict Bellagio will close the Conservatory (such attractions are expensive and don’t really contribute to the bottom line), but we have never been happier to be wrong about something. So far.

A subtle nod to the Second Amendment. We’ll wait.

This year’s Christmas display is “Gingerbread Dreams, A Holiday Confection.” We sometimes have ginger dreams, but that’s something entirely different.

The centerpiece of this year’s display is a 42-foot-tall white fir tree donned with gay apparel, as the kids say.

The Christmas tree boasts 10,000 lights and 8,700 ornaments.

The tree is from Mt. Shasta, which would be a conflict with Bellagio’s partnership with Coca-Cola if Shasta were still a thing.

The “West Bed” also features a gingerbread village with five miniature shops and a chapel where drunk miniature people get married, then immediately regret their decision.

The West Bed also has a train, a popular feature from previous years. There are supposed to be monitors giving guests a look at the train’s P.O.V., but the monitors were taking a union-mandated break during our visit.

Running a train isn’t uncommon in Las Vegas, but it’s extra special when it happens at Bellagio.

The North Bed has three massive eggs inspired by Faberge, the company that makes shampoo, conditioner and eau de toilette sprays.

According to Bellagio, “eggs are symbols of hope and purity,” so we honestly have no idea why they are in Las Vegas.

Inside one of the eggs is a five-foot gingerbread house made of real, wait for it, gingerbread.

Much of this year’s display is food-based, and it’s the first time we’ve seen a sign warning guests to not eat the display.

We are not kidding.

Every time we think the world has reached peak stupid, it peaks again.

We probably could’ve saved a ton of time by just sharing our quick walk-through of the Bellagio Conservatory’s 2022 Christmas display, but we saved it to build some suspense. It was crowded, so ease up on the unsolicited feedback.

The East Bed, which actually isn’t any farther east than the North or South Beds, features a life-sized gingerbread-style cottage flanked by 14-foot-tall nutcrackers.

Nutcracker dolls originated in a region of Germany, Erzgebirge, which is impossible to say without it sounding like you’re ridiculing someone.

Rounding out our visit was the South Bed, populated by elves, which we’re pretty sure is no longer a politically correct term. We prefer “Santa’s indentured servants.”

Anyway, a half dozen of these oppressed laborers “joyfully” bake cookies and one risks his life to hang a decoration atop a tall ladder.

Elves derive from Norse mythology. Nordic legend also espoused that our world was made from the body parts of a slain hermaphroditic giant, Ymir. Happy holidays!

The South Bed is also home to several polar bears sporting the Coca-Cola logo, one of the reasons the Bellagio Conservatory is still free, if you get our drift.

See, it’s funny because “bear” and “bare” are homophones.

Bellagio’s public relations team is always nice enough to provide some stats about the seasonal display.

googie 140,000: Number of Poinsettias throughout the display
googie 110,000: Total number of light bulbs on all the trees
googie 15,000: Total number of gingerbread men (ahem, Bellagio, it’s gingerbread persons)
googie 13,250: Number of white carnations
googie 10,000: Number of lights on the Christmas tree
googie 8,700: Number of ornaments on the Christmas tree
googie 4,800: Total preserved roses on the four giant Poinsettias
googie 2,000: Number of peppermints
googie 800: Pounds of faux white frosting used on the gingerbread cottage
googie 500: Number of chocolate hearts on the East Bed gingerbread cottage
googie 80: Number of team members who bring the display to life
googie 41: Number of fresh-cut white fir trees in the display
googie 18: Number of giant gingerbread and mirror snowflakes

Avoid letting your dog or cat interact with poinsettias. Also, what in the hell are you doing bringing a dog or cat with you to the Bellagio Conservatory?

One of the more incredible stats is the holiday display is assembled in a mere six days. Talk about a Christmas miracle.

The Christmas display runs through January 1, 2023.

The Conservatory’s “Lunar” display (Chinese New Year) opens January 9, 2023 and runs through March 4, 2023. Here’s more.

The horticultural team at Bellagio are some of the most sleep-deprived people you will ever meet. They have extremely high job satisfaction, we understand, as they give joy to millions of people, so there’s that.

Shout-out to Bellagio for making sure its Christmas display includes diversity. Unlike Las Vegas until about 1960. Awkward.

Because the Bellagio Conservatory has been cranking out whimsy so long, it’s easy to take this free attraction for granted, but don’t do that.

And when you visit, drop a few bucks into a slot machine, please. That’s how free things stay free.

Big props to MGM Resorts, Bellagio and the team of 80 magic-makers who have delivered another wonderful holiday display at the Conservatory. And we mean “wonderful” the way it was originally intended, “to excite wonder.”

Mission accomplished, Bellagio.