Confirmed: Wet Republic to Get a Rebrand

None other than bigtime entertainment bible Variety has confirmed our scoop: MGM Grand’s game-changing dayclub Wet Republic will itself undergo a change. It will be rebranded to Palm Tree Beach Club.

Palm Tree Beach Club will feature DJ Kygo, whomever that might be.

Reps of Palm Tree Beach Club could not resist describing it as a “bold, immersive music and entertainment experience,” mostly so we’d have an easier time poking fun at it.

These are A.I. butts, not real butts, you weirdo.

According to Variety, Kygo was previously a resident performer at Wynn for eight years. We missed the memo, apparently.

“Over the years, he has collaborated with Selena Gomez, Rita Ora, Miguel, and John Legend, among others, and launched a Palm Tree festival in locations around the world,” shares Variety.

Further details include, “Spanning 60,000 square feet, Palm Tree Beach Club will include a ground-level stage, salt water pool, 12 bungalows and 10 cabanas, along with daybeds and chaise lounges accommodating 3,000 guests. There is a new sound system, LED screens, and pyrotechnics set within a theme that is ‘Beverly Hills meets Palm Springs with a youthful Country Club touch. Every material is new, from the floor to horticulture and greenery to the fabrics in the cabana to the layout of tables,'” according to Tao Group Hospitality Co-CEO Jason Strauss. “Beverly Hills meets Palm Springs”? Those are different things?

If you know anything about Las Vegas dayclubs, you know the pool doesn’t start out as a salt water pool, but they tend to end up that way, if you get our drift.

The concept for Palm Tree Beach Club was apparently inspired by Jimmy Buffett and his Margaritaville brand, further evidence nightclub/dayclub people live in an alternate reality of some sort.

It’s worth noting Kygo opened a Palm Tree Club hotel in Miami. Just buy the Artisan, sorry The Lexi, already.

Anyway, we are not dayclub person, but we understand some people enjoy it. We’re really just here to briefly set aside our much-touted modesty to show how we effortlessly and masterfully combine humor and breaking news on a regular basis.

The Wet Republic brand was launched in 2008, or 150 years in Las Vegas nightlife years. Wet Republic was originally an Angel Management Group thing, then it was sold to Hakkasan Group. Hakkason Group was later acquired by Tao Group.

Yes, we broke that acquisition news, too. It is getting more and more difficult to set aside our much-touted modesty, but we will endeavor to persevere.

Fun fact: There’s a better than average chance literally no one attending a Kygo (nee Kyrre Gørvell-Dahll) show knows where “endeavor to persevere” came from, we’re all doomed.

Let’s just say the Hot Girl Economy is alive and well in Las Vegas.

Another fun fact: Palm trees are not native to Las Vegas. Then again, few things are.