Sartiano’s Italian Steakhouse and Zero Bond Open at Wynn, Plus Something About Art

A new restaurant, Sartiano’s Italian Steakhouse, and Zero Bond, a private members club, have opened at Wynn Las Vegas.

Both of these venues are collaborations between Wynn Resorts and Bond Hospitality. We haven’t been to either of these places yet, but we tend to like anything at Wynn, so we are predisposed to liking them despite the sneaking suspicion we can’t afford them.

Oh, and there’s also an opening art exhibition at Zero Bond. We shall learn more about it just as you do, in real time from a news release, just to make us seem like a man of the people. Onward and news releaseward!

This is the Tortellini ($42) with butternut squash, saba and amaretti. If you’ve been in an accident, trust the law offices of Squash, Saba and Amaretti.

First up, Sartiano’s Italian Steakhouse. They had us at “Italian.”

Wynn says, “The restaurant pays homage to Bond Hospitality founder Scott Sartiano’s Neapolitan heritage with culinary direction from three-time James Beard Award-winning Chef Alfred Portale.”

Wynn continues, “Located in an exclusive alcove of the resort adjacent to Zero Bond at Wynn Las Vegas and overlooking Wynn Golf Club, Sartiano’s Italian Steakhouse channels the energy of gathering, socializing, and celebrating unforgettable nights. Executive Chef Michael Rubinstein, a Las Vegas native with more than 15 years of culinary experience from some of the city’s most prestigious restaurants, helms day-to-day kitchen operations and brings a bold technique and local perspective.”

We were going to conclude our cutting-and-pasting there, but then we hit the paragraph about the menu and we are literally drooling. Not figuratively. Literal drool. We would post a photo of our drool, but we aren’t having a great hair day, so we’ll just share another photo provided by Wynn Las Vegas.

Yes, there’s lasagna. It’s just not your grandpa’s lasagna. You’ll live.

As the kids say, LFG: “The menu perfects the art of sharing, echoing signature dishes from Sartiano’s New York flagship while also introducing new creations conceived exclusively for Wynn. The robust bistecca program showcases an impressive selection of wet- and dry-aged prime cuts and American Wagyu, including a 40 oz. Dry-Aged Bistecca Fiorentina carved tableside with porcini, peppercorn, and salsa verde and the American Wagyu 10 oz. NY Strip, with enhancements like ‘Truffle Short Rib & Egg Yolk Raviolo,’ ‘Butter-Poached Maine Lobster Tail’ and ‘Grilled Red King Crab Merus Scampi.’ Additional highlights include the ‘Caviar Cannoli’ with whipped mascarpone and chive; ‘Fettuccine Alfredo alla Romana,’ served tableside, with aged Parmigiano and burro di bufala; and a spectacular ‘Plateau Di Mare’ consisting of oysters, clams calabrese, jumbo shrimp, king crab, Maine lobster, grilled seafood salad, toro and caviar.”

The “Fettuccine Alfredo alla Romana” is $125 and serves two. The “Plateau Di Mare” (fancy for seafood platter) is $225 (“Piccolo,” or little) and $448 (“Grande,” or big). The nine-ounce filet will run you $87 and the bone-in filet is $130. The six-ounce Akaushi Wagyu Tenderloin is $94.

We’re a little grossed out by the thought of “Caviar Cannoli,” but we’re up for almost everything else!

Look up “fraternity hazing” in the dictionary, this is what you’ll see, all due respect.

“Good evening, restaurant customers, for dessert we have a lovely yellow cake with a decadent chocolate frosting. On this classic, sumptuous cake we are going to place a giant slab of raw Bobtail squid. Buon appetito!”

This quote was provided for illustrative purposes only. They aren’t going to serve yellow cake with chocolate frosting, despite it being the best cake in the world. They are also not going to use Bobtail squid, mostly because they are adorable.

Our fear is the youths will discover Bobtail squid and start carrying them around in their pockets as a status symbol.

We are excited to dine at Sartiano’s Italian Steakhouse because every restaurant we’ve tried at Wynn we like.

Add to that the fact the restaurant’s bar program is overseen by Mixology Goddess Mariena Mercer Boarini and we are so there.

Every cocktail tells a story. Some of those stories involve raw-dogging and vague memories of proposing marriage to traffic cones. Pace yourself.

Following our dinner, we are going to visit the newly-opened Zero Bond!

At which point a doorman will look at our Stardust T-shirt and mom jeans and determine we are riff-raff, and we will be escorted directly to high limit slots because they don’t care what you wear as long as you’re playing $25 per hand Double Double Bonus Poker.

Longtime readers will remember we broke the story about Zero Bond coming to Wynn Las Vegas, mostly because it’s hard to forget given how many times we’ve reminded everyone about it.

Zero Bond is described as “the distinguished New York private members club founded by Scott Sartiano and Will Makris.”

In addition, “This is the first major expansion of the membership community outside of NYC, bringing the spirit and sensibility of its New York roots to a new destination built around culture, connection and hospitality.”

We’ll cut to the chase. The price of admission is a one-time initiation fee of $1,000, and $2,750 in annual dues. If you’re interested, you can apply for membership online. It helps if you get a referral from an existing Zero Bond member, but it’s not required.

Heads up: “A clear and recent headshot must be included.”

Be yourself, just a version of yourself that is acceptable to Zero Bond.

Zero Bond says, “The 15,000-square-foot club is designed for members to gather across a range of experiences, from dining and social spaces to cultural programming and curated events tied to major moments throughout the year. Signature spaces include the members-only restaurant The Fairway Grill, The Salon as the heart of the club, a Sculpture Garden overlooking the Wynn Golf Course and private dining rooms.”

The opening drew celebrities, as you might suspect.

We aren’t personally a private membership club type person, mostly because we derive much more enjoyment from judging people who are.

This is giving “future location for a film featuring Axel Foley flipping a guy into a buffet table.”

As for the aforementioned art, “Wynn Las Vegas launches the opening art exhibition for Zero Bond, the exclusive private members club, curated through a collaboration with Heather James. The exhibition was conceived in collaboration with Wynn Design & Development’s President and Chief Creative Officer, Todd-Avery Lenahan, spans masters across movements and centuries, and signifies one of the most diverse collections of fine art assembled for a single-site exhibition in Las Vegas. Items on display will vary over time, and feature masterpieces from the Impressionist period and first quarter of the 20th century, alongside post-war, pop art, and contemporary artworks, as well as Asian antiquities from A.D. 500 through the 10th century.”

If you think we are only mentioning this art exhibit because Wynn Design & Development’s President and Chief Creative Officer, Todd-Avery Lenahan, reads our blog and we don’t want to be on his bad side, you are correct.

The exhibition showcases consignments from a variety of artists, three of whom we recognize (Ansel Adams, Renoir and Sir Winston Churchill, who we had no idea was an artist), including Ansel Adams, John Baldessari, Thomas Hart Benton, Toby Burrows, Alexander Calder, Sir Winston Churchill, Camille Claudel, Richard Diebenkorn, Lynne Mapp Drexler, Robert Henri, Marie Felix Hippolyte-Lucas, Hans Hofmann, Winslow Homer, Saul Kaminer, Andre Kertesz, Amedeo Modigliani, Jorge Pardo, Max Pellegrini, Pierre-Auguste Renoir, George Rickey and Andrew Wyeth.

You are free to make fun of the name Marie Felix Hippolyte-Lucas, because he’s dead. You should also make fun of yourself because you thought Marie Felix Hippolyte-Lucas was a woman, you backwater bumpkin.

Here is one of the paintings at Zero Bond, “Femme au Corsage Rouge” (or “Woman in a Red Bodice”) by Pierre-Auguste Renoir.

You are so gullible! The “Woman in a Red Bodice” could not be drinking a Mariena Mercer Boarini cocktail in 1908 because it hadn’t been invented yet. She would also not have possessed the forearm of a longshoreman. Here’s the original, yawn. Back to art class with you, bumpkin.

Thankfully, Todd-Avery Lenahan’s knowledge of art was not based upon taking one art class at Leeward Community College in Hawaii. In our defense, in college, we were far more concerned about frequent and involuntary erections than abstract impressionism.

We are actually intrigued by this art exhibition, so we will be investigating further how someone who is not a Zero Bond member can view it, possibly by greasing the palms of a doorman or possibly Wynn Design & Development’s President and Chief Creative Officer, Todd-Avery Lenahan.

Zero Bond has an outdoor sculpture garden overlooking Wynn Golf Club that features monumental works by Herb Alpert, Jim Dine, Jeppe Hein, Joan Miro and Robert Indiana. It seems more likely we’ll catch a glimpse of these outdoor pieces than the ones inside Zero Bond, but given green fees are about $750 a round (before gratuity), nevermind.

There’s always something new at Wynn Las Vegas, and the resort has set a standard everyone else aspires to.

Wynn Las Vegas doesn’t just feature art. It is art. Not everything there is for everyone, but it gives us something priceless: The chance to dream. And dreams are the stuff from which Las Vegas was made. That, and boobs. But mostly dreams.