{"id":42771,"date":"2025-02-04T16:19:19","date_gmt":"2025-02-05T00:19:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.casino.org\/vitalvegas\/?p=42771"},"modified":"2025-02-04T17:12:56","modified_gmt":"2025-02-05T01:12:56","slug":"slot-machine-chair-rental-could-be-next-casino-nuisance-fee","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.casino.org\/vitalvegas\/slot-machine-chair-rental-could-be-next-casino-nuisance-fee\/","title":{"rendered":"“Slot Machine Chair Rental” Could Be Next Casino Nuisance Fee, Per A.I."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

We talk to A.I. a lot. Maybe too much.<\/p>\n

During one of our chats, we asked ChatGPT what the next nuisance fee from casinos might be. The answer: “Slot Machine Chair Rental.”<\/p>\n

And there we thought A.I. didn’t have jokes. It gets better.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Absurd! Also, give it a minute.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

A “Slot Machine Chair Rental” wasn’t A.I.’s only suggestion, of course.<\/p>\n

Other goodies: “Air Conditioning Usage Fee, “Casino Loss Recovery Fee,” “Resort Fee Enhancement Fee,” “Elevator Access Fee,” “Window Transparency Fee,” “Bed Usage Fee,” “Resort Scent Experience Fee” and “Courtesy Smile Fee.”<\/p>\n

It’s all fun and games until somebody actually does it.<\/p>\n

Did anyone think casinos would add more zeroes to roulette? Did anyone think they’d have the audacity to change the payout for a blackjack. Did anyone predict restaurants would charge for window seating?<\/p>\n

They’ve done all that and more.<\/p>\n

The “Slot Machine Chair Rental” fee just sort of struck a cord, though.<\/p>\n

There was a time when slot machines didn’t have chairs<\/a>. Mostly because slots were a diversion for spouses of table games players and nobody took slot players seriously. Now, slots drive most casino revenue.<\/p>\n

\"Slot
How are there not slot machine hammocks?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The biggest news in slot machine chairs in recent years is they’re getting wider<\/a>. Awkward.<\/p>\n

Chairs eventually became the norm for slot machines, but A.I. realizes casinos are always coming up with new ways to enhance the bottom line.<\/p>\n

How would casinos justify chair rentals?<\/p>\n

We asked A.I. to write a news release announcing the new service. It was alarming similar to many of the casino news releases we get every day.<\/p>\n

The release says, “Starting immediately, guests wishing to sit while playing slot machines will be required to pay a $5 per sit-down rental fee. The fee ensures that each guest enjoys a dedicated chair, complete with high-quality cushioning, strategic placement near the slot machine, and an unparalleled opportunity to remain comfortably seated while losing money.”<\/p>\n

Let’s just say April Fools’ Day in Las Vegas will never be the same.<\/p>\n

Here’s the complete news release.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Be afraid, Public Affairs Coordinators, be very afraid.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Crazy, right? Can you imagine if casinos offered certain loyalty club tiers free parking as a perk of their achievement? You know, that thing that was always free before?<\/p>\n

Before you rupture a major internal organ from laughter, we then asked A.I. to flesh out the operational aspects of a “Slot Machine Chair Rental.”<\/p>\n

A.I. did not complain about the additional workload, and at no point mentioned it was time for a break or lunch.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Don’t you DARE print this out, casino operations executive.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We, too, were impressed and mortified. Be afraid, MBAs, be very afraid.<\/p>\n

Naturally, A.I. offered to draft an internal memo announcing the new initiative.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Is there anything A.I. can’t do?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Of course there are employees talking points for customers experiencing “mild outrage.”<\/p>\n

A.I. isn’t too far off when it says, “Many of our most valued guests have requested enhanced seating options, and we’re excited to deliver on that demand.” Casinos claim new fees are “due to customer demand” all the time. They say resort fees are for guest convenience. We are not making this up.<\/p>\n

No, casinos aren’t going to roll out a “Slot Machine Chair Rental” fee.<\/p>\n

They are, however, going to keep creating irksome new fees to improve their margins.<\/p>\n

They’ll keep pushing it until there’s a pain point.<\/p>\n

Las Vegas casino revenue was flat or down for the last six months of 2024.<\/p>\n

You’re going to want to sit down for this: Between commoditization (the legalization of gambling across the country) and nickel-and-diming, this could very well be the pain point.<\/p>\n

There will be a rental fee for the chair, of course.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We talk to A.I. a lot. Maybe too much. During one of our chats, we asked ChatGPT what the next nuisance fee from casinos might be. The answer: “Slot Machine Chair Rental.” And there we thought A.I. didn’t have jokes. It gets better. A “Slot Machine Chair Rental” wasn’t A.I.’s only suggestion, of course. Other […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[23,30],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-42771","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-vegas","category-las-vegas-wtf"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n"Slot Machine Chair Rental" Could Be Next Casino Nuisance Fee, Per A.I. | Vital Vegas<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"We talk to A.I. a lot. Maybe too much. During one of our chats, we asked ChatGPT what the next nuisance fee from casinos might be. 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